One Month

One month ago today, my Mom went home.  She left this earthly life and journeyed into the open arms of loved ones waiting for her.  She had completed all that God had sent her to do, and so she moved on to her next assignment. 

To those of us still working out our salvation here in this earthly sphere  this month has seemed like a year and also as quick as blinking.  In that month there has not been one day, that I haven't thought of her.  There hasn't been one day that I haven't cried for the void I feel in my heart and in my life.  It is a strange thing these anniversaries.  When I think that she did it.  She succeeded at this life and made it through, I smile for her grand success.  She has graduated in away, and she graduated with heavenly honors.  For that I feel joy.  Yet, I miss her so much that it hurts in my very soul. 

It is the quiet moments like when I was walking the trails by my house on the way to pick the kids up from  school and I thought "I had so wanted Mom to see this place where I live.  To walk the trails with me."  Or when without thinking last week, I had something to share with her and I dialed her speed dial number before I had even realized what I had done.  I had to listen to her voice.  Needed to hear something that was tangible of her.  I wanted with everything to leave her a message, share my thoughts and have her call me back. ( I didn't just in case my Dad checked her messages I didn't want him to think I was completely crazy.)

But it is the small things that drive the hardest hit, because she was saturated in the details of our lives.  So today on this anniversary, all I can say is that I love my Mom and miss her terribly, and that I am so proud of the woman she is and the life she has lived.

Alisa's Thoughts & The Grandma Quilt

My sister Alisa is one of those women who has a beautiful, strong, and fierce fully, graceful presence.  She is creative and conveys her thoughts and emotions through the things she creates.  She arranged the flowers for Mom's casket and other flowers displayed during the funeral.  She embroidered handkerchief's for our entire family with the word's "I love you" in my Mom's handwriting.  Recently she entered a writing contest on the topic of quilting and I wanted (with permission) to share her entry here.  She has a strong and powerful voice to match her creativity and I feel blessed to be able to share her words below.

I have always wanted to be able to create things that are beautiful and useful.  Growing up I learned to embroider and crochet, and enjoyed making projects for myself and others.  After I was married, my husband's grandmother took me under her wing and taught me how to quilt.  I loved the quiet contemplation and peace it afforded me.  I love to make quilts, big and small.  I have made them for friends and family, big enough for a queen sized bed and small enough for a doll.  It has always been fun and relaxing, but recently it became more to me than that. 

 About two months ago my mother was diagnosed with cancer.  She was going to have to go through the difficulty of chemotherapy, and I wanted her to have something that she could take with her to symbolize the love and support of her seven children and eleven grandchildren.  I turned to quilting.  I had all of my siblings send me hand prints of their kids, and I embroidered them on the quilt in their favorite colors.  The quilt had the name of each child and grandchild and in the middle was emblazoned our family motto during this difficult time, "Be Strong."  This quilt was able to keep her warm and as comfortable as was possible during her first round of chemo.  That would be its only trip with my mom to chemo.  Devastatingly, she passed away only a few short weeks after the quilt was completed. 

Before she died, she stated very clearly that she wanted the quilt left in her home for any of her grandchildren who visited to wrap up in and know that it was a 'hug from grandma'.  Her chemo quilt has become the Grandma quilt, and was used often in those first few days after she left us.  Quilting gave me the comfort of being useful and productive when there was nothing I could do to help my mom.  In turn, it gave my mom a way to leave a token of her love behind with us when she passed.

Happy Birthday Mom!

So today is Mom's birthday.  My heart has been a bit heavy today, well for the past week.  I feel like our world has been turned upside down.  I caught myself calling my Mom this week when I felt frustrated about something.  Without realizng it I heard the phone ringing, thinking she would answer any moment.  Her voicemail message came on and all I could do was cry.  I miss her.  I miss her voice.  I missed calling her today to sing Happy Birthday with my children.  She would have been 63 today.  I miss that I would usually go get her when I was in Utah, take her to lunch or make lunch at my house.  I miss that I can't see her or hear her.  I just miss her.  But as I went for my morning walk with a dear friend, and the sun shone on my face, I thought she would have loved this day.  The clear blue skies, the sunshine, her flowers peeking through the soil, and she would have loved her birthday today.  So a very Happy Birthday to my beautiful mother, who is celebrating with her Mom today.  I hope they have had a beautiful day enjoying time together and maybe a bit of sunshine.

 

 

To all of those who still want to follow our blog, we will be updating with the talks and pictures from her Funeral in the next few days.

Obituary and Viewing/Funeral Information

The following is  Mom's obituary.  Funeral and viewing information is included. 
If you want to look at the link on the Russon Brothers Website go here:
http://www.russonmortuary.com/sitemaker/sites/RUSSON1/obit.cgi?user=1260047Grover
Thank you for the amazing outpouring of love we have felt from so many.  We feel the strength of your love and prayers. 

Life Legacy

Charlotta Elaine Cook Grover passed away on February 27, 2014, in the comfort of her home. She was born March 13, 1951, in Jacksonville, Illinois, to Charles Byron Lewis and Lora Florence Cook. She graduated from Brigham Young University in 1973 with a degree in Elementary Education. She married Thomas David Grover in the Ogden Utah Temple on August 30, 1973. Dedicated to her faith in God, she served those around her faithfully and with loving kindness and concern. With a background in education, her children remember fondly the many long hours she spent helping them with math homework, book reports, class presentations, science projects, and a host of other assignments.

She was happiest when surrounded by her family and friends. Known to her grandchildren as Grandma Charlotta, she would often take everyday moments to teach valuable life lessons. Her grandchildren loved her for her kindness and generosity, and always enjoyed choosing a treat from the “grandma box” when they visited.

Charlotta was an active member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Her faith in Jesus Christ defined her life. Whatever she was asked to do in the wards and stakes in which she lived, she did with all her heart and might. She cared greatly about those she served and would find ways to bless their lives on a regular basis. Before and even after the advent of the Internet, she maintained a vast gospel library in her home and was able to recall from memory quotes, talks and insights that stretched back decades.

Charlotta was also an active participant in the community. She often participated in local issues by handing out fliers and advocating for those causes she believed in. She believed that people should care about what goes on around them, and take an active role in promoting those values and ideals that lead to good communities.

She is survived by her husband, Tom; seven children: Emily (David McAllister); Alisa (Dan Simpson); Amelia; Thomas (Erin); Breanne; Nathan; Samuel (Brynn); and 11 grandchildren: Ethan, Grace and Logan McAllister; Cora, Hyrum, Rebecca, Elisabeth and William Simpson; and Jacob, Ellenor and Charlotte Grover. Viewing and funeral services will be held at the Centerville North Stake Center, 1461 North Main Street, Centerville, UT. Viewing times will be Thursday, March 6, from 6 to 8 pm, and Friday, March 7, from 9:45 to 10:45 am. Funeral services will be held Friday, March 7, at 11 am. In lieu of flowers, the Charlotta Grover Memorial Account has been set up at America First Credit Union to assist with medical

Charlotta Elaine Cook Grover March 13, 1951-February 27, 2014

Our Mom passed away yesterday afternoon at 3:30 pm.  She was at peace and surrounded by loved ones.  As much as our hearts are heavy, we feel buoyed up by her strength and love.  As in life she is sweetly navigating us through this experience, except now from the other side of the veil.  She was so at peace with her decision to forgo treatment and as with everything in her life, once she was sure of God's direction, she completely followed the course.  We are in the process of planning as a family and will update the blog with information regarding her funeral.

Family Time

This week Mom has had lots of visitors and family surrounding her.  She is so dearly loved and we want to spend as much time with her as possible. 

Grandpa, Elle and Jacob

This is "Aunt Debbie" with Mom.  They are really cousins,
but we love Debbie dearly and call her our Aunt.  It was
a blessing for her to be able to come and visit from
Arizona.

This is the photo wall that Brynn and Breanne put together so
Mom can look at her family whenever she wants.

Breanne giving Mom a neck rub.

Brynn with Charlotte



I love my Mom's beautiful face. 

My kids skyped with Grandma this morning and she is getting more and more tired.  I realized this might be the last
time they are able to hear her respond.  It is a difficult place to be, so far away wishing we could spend every moment with my Mom, and yet the last few days I have been wrapped in a bubble of spiritual peace.  I know the Lord is granting me peace as we watch, wait and pray for her comfort. We love you Mom!

Little Acts of Kindess and their Mighty Force of Strength

On this rocky path we are walking there  have been so many beautiful bursts of sunshine and flowers placed in our lives from others acts of kindness and service.  My Mom's room is full of flowers.  Lovely flowers and cards came from her co-workers yesterday and in typical Mom form she seemed surprised that she had made an impact.  She is truly humble and I don't think she realizes the impact for good she has on those around her.  In her mind it is simply doing what she should or what is right.

My brother's friends have come to visit and tell "Mom Grover" they love her.  My sister received a room full of balloons from her friends.  So many people have sent flowers and cards.  Her ward members sent a basket of cards that touched her heart more than words can express.  Meals have been brought.  Messages of prayers and love have been sent to each of us and to her.  We are very private people as a whole and tend to be a bit independent.  I finally decided to post what is going in our lives  on Face Book to let those who love her know what was happening.  I have been overwhelmed with the response of love and support. 

My college roommate Erin Timothy Botz sent me a private message, that touched my mother greatly.  She said, she had to do something after reading my message and so went to donate blood in my Mom's honor.  My Mom had a blood transfusion last week and so that simple act brought tears to mine and Mom's eyes.  There is so much goodness in the world.  So many people who listen to that small voice inside and then act on what they know to be a good deed.

I stayed in Utah last week while my family drove home.  I placed one phone call and sent out three texts to coordinate the next school day so David could go to work.  Within minutes I had carpool covered, places for my children to stay, a ride home from the airport and a hot meal for my family that night.  The power of good deed and good people is overwhelming

There have been so many things.  Employers who have been so generous and kind to my siblings.  Visits, bags of treats delivered and wrapped in love, letters, hugs and people willing to cry with us.

I am learning that there are so many people who truly know how to mourn with those that mourn and comfort those that stand in need of comfort.  For all of your efforts know that your simple acts of kindness have brought forth a mighty force of love and strength.